Step in the right direction

"Mom, have you ever done something and then wished you could go back and undo it?"

That was the question that one of the boys posed to me yesterday.  This comes after he has had to learn a hard lesson about choices he made.  He was dealt the consequences by Joel and I, and it appears that we have made an impact. 

Something I have been learning is to be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.  This is so extremely difficult for me.  I tend to be quick on the draw, something that is totally opposite of Joel.  He reacts slowly and is more rational in the moment.  At times it is so frustrating for me.  I just want to "get in and get out" as he likes to say.  But yesterday, I was given a gift at seeing the fruit of my labor. 

When we were faced with the above situation this week, Joel had to give me "the look" to remind me to not react yet.  I literally had to bite my lip to keep from reacting.  We listened and sent said boy off to his room so we could discuss the consequences.  At first, we didn't agree on how to handle it.  But eventually, I saw the wisdom in Joel's approach and we dealt with the problem. 

It has been a good week since.  There has been an open line of communication between me and said boy.  And then yesterday happened.  He came into the room where I was working and sat down next to me. 

"Mom, have you ever done something and then wished you could go back and undo it?" 

Cha-ching!  Fist pump!  Happy dance!  It got through!  He got the message.  He understands.  Oh Son!  I'm so proud of you.

"Of course, Son, lots of times.  Some more serious than others, but yes.  There are regrets."  We talked some more about what he has learned and he was so proud to share with Joel later what he learned. 

This was a gift from God.  A high-five per se.  We did something right.  We got through and it opened up the door of communication that much more. 

"Take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires."  James 1:19

So it is worth it to be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry because it's not just for your sake, but also for those around you. Those that see and hear the way you react. Your kids, your friends, your family, strangers even.  The way we conduct ourselves impacts others.  So how do you want to impact someone's life?  I know I want my actions to be ones that lead others to the righteous life God desires.